Queen and Latifa

Remember the festive collar from yesterday?

How DARE you?!

Look at how much 'Tifa loves her new collar! I don't think! I love her look of utter hatred with a smattering of shame and horror!

Despite her disdain, I think she looks fabulous! And festive. And ridiculous.

I'm such a meanie!

M x

Does anyone remember Swizzels Fizzers?

For those of you that didn't grow up in the 80s, these sweets were particularly popular in Britain during that period. They are fizzy, slightly chalky sweets that, as a kid, I was particularly fond of. As is somewhat common amongst most thirty somethings, for me, 80s retro is a guilty pleasure and a special indulgence. As such, when I saw a big pack of Swizzels sweets (predominantly full of stuff, such as Fizzers, that I would personally consider 80s sweets) in Sainsburys the other day, I added it to my basket on a whim.

So there I was later that evening eating from my bag of retro sweets including such classics as Drumsticks, Mr Chews, and Fizzers, and as is 'Tifa's norm, when she saw I was eating, she wanted some. So up she comes, meowing and tromping all over my lap, begging for people food. She will leave cat food for hours on end before eating it, but as soon as there is an opportunity for people food, she all over you, begging for some.

In the past, 'Tifa has enjoyed, amongst many others, cheddar, Fray Bentos pie, pate, fish fingers, and lasagne. She has rejected, amongst many other things, chocolate, haribo, and pineapple after giving them a try. So to get rid of her, I put a fizzer in front of her, knowing that she wouldn't like it given her track record with sweet things. And as usual, she gave it a quick, cautionary, taster lick. It turns out that the diva kitty wasn't quite ready for fizziness on her tongue, and she pulled a hilarious scrunged up face, whacked the offending fizzer across the room, scowled at me, and darted off.

It's rare I get one up on my cat, and I know I should have felt guilty for inflicting freakout fizzy tongue on my poor unsuspecting princess, but I did laugh! Poor 'Tifa!

M x

A week ago, I mentioned that I was contemplating getting rid of 'Tifa's basket in favour of an exercise bike. Well, this is a follow up to that particularly life changing entry to this blog.

I couldn't quite bring myself to do it: it was 'Tifa's basket, however indifferent she had been to it. She's my princess and I dote upon her, and I couldn't quite bring myself to remove her basket. Surely all cats need a basket? I did, however, decide that the exercise bike definitely needed to be in the front room to coerce me into doing some form of exercise ever: it was my motivational tool to get myself out of the rut that is me being the least fit that I have been in my entire life. So I had a reshuffle, and managed to just about fit the various items I have in the front room allowing for the addition of the exercise bike without the removal of the basket. It's a bit cluttered and somewhat garish, but then, I've always been told that my flat is 'very me', so I guess it's just a little bit more like me than ever.

I was cynical as to her ever using the basket. Then suddenly, for seeminly no reason, she was constantly sat in it! I was stunned. She suddenly loves that basket, and has officially added it to her favourite places within my (her) home: end of bed, computer chair, Mark's lap, left hand side of the sofa, behind the telly, and now, basket. Madness!

Then I realised. The new basket location is next to the radiator. And it happened to be moved there on the same day as I switched the heating on. Diva kitty likes the snuggley warmth! What's the betting she becomes indifferent to the basket again next summer?

Oh, and I still haven't had a go on the exercise bike...

M x

'Tifa has recently developed a particularly bad habit - naughty diva!

As I've mentioned previously, once I've gone to bed and am asleep, she likes to snuggle up to me and go to sleep herself. Almost without fail, I wake up the following morning with a kitty in my lap. However, sometimes I might not sleep in my own bed for whatever reason, and 'Tifa has made it quite clear that she does not appreciate it. The last few times that I've come home the morning after staying over somewhere else, she has meowed hostiley and given me a bop on the ankle. I feel a little like Andy Capp being admonished by Flo! It's almost like she's saying "And where have you been?!"

Mean, yet cute and amusingly divaish: pretty much parr for the course with my Princess, then?

Have fun,

M x 

I'm never really without inspiration for ideas for this blog, but sometimes cute or funny things that the diva kitty does don't seemingly warrant a blog to themselves. I'm sad enough to keep a notebook of ideas for blogs next to my computer, and going through the list, there's a number of ideas that, whilst they might not perhaps warrant a whole blog to themselves, they're worth mentioning in a compilation.

When 'Tifa sees that I have cat treats for her, she runs around in circles excitedly and meows. I hold back sometimes just to watch her. I wonder if she notices the huge grin she evokes from me every time she does this.

Whatever the food is, if I'm eating it, 'Tifa wants some. She normally behaves though because she's worked out that if I tell her no and she lets me finish, she'll get some eventually. This does not apply if she can smell that it's fish - she goes nuts, and has to be removed from the room.

Anything that even vaguely dangles: the diva kitty wants to play with it!

'Tifa hates me reading books and magazines in bed and gets terribly jealous. I presume she likes to be able to see my face, and my reading material hides it. As such, she becomes particularly contrary repeatedly headbutting the offending book/ mag making it completely impossible to read.

The diva kitty likes Cheddar and Edam, but doesn't like Stilton or Blackstick Blue.

The diva kitty dislikes it when I'm pottering about the flat doing various things. She likes to be able to observe me, and as such prefers me to stay put somewhere for long periods of time. As such, she follows me if I'm pottering and meows her displeasure at me causing her such inconvenience.

Just some random thoughts here - I will probably post similar blogs periodically...

M x 

Since I got back from my holiday, 'Tifa has been meowing a lot.

Seriously: lots and lots and lots.

She's always been a somewhat chatty girl, but lately she's been extra receptive and needy for to cuddles and extremely vocal. She meows at me all the time. Seriously, it's a constant meow fest! It's hella cute, but the paranoid part of me thinks that maybe she's still traumatised from me not being around for a week and is begging me not to abandon her ever again. Surely the diva kitty isn't that needy and attached is she? After all, she's the diva kitty and has shown me much disdain for my affection in the past.

But she's meowing lots. In fact, she's meowing now.

I'm never going on holiday ever again!

M x

Sorry about the recent hiatus on this blog!

As I mentioned in a recent(ish) entry, I've been on holiday for the last week having been at Manchester Pride all the bank holiday, and then straight onto London for the following week. I had lots and lots of fun, but as I feared in the aforementioned previous blog, I did worry terribly about my princess while I was in London. Thankfully, Ryoko and Phil (my mates that were looking after her) reassured me throughout the week via phone calls, and she was fine when I got home.

Oh, how I pampered her when I got home! She got cuddles and treats and fuss and cat milk and more cuddles and cat toy action and kisses and more treats!

One thing that I thought I'd share with you that happened while I was packing my case last week was this:

Don't leave me!

While I was packing, the diva kitty jumping into my case did nothing to ease my guilt about abandoning her for a week! She looked at me with her big green kitty eyes and I felt like such a meanie! Mind you, I still went, so I'm not quite as under the thumb as some people might suggest!

M x

Oh dear!

I am tired and I really want to go to bed, but I can't currently move from my computer chair. 'Tifa is sat in my lap, and she is settled and content, and I'll feel so mean if I move: it'll upset her! I hate upsetting my girl!

I've done everything that I wanted to do on World of Warcraft tonight and done Facebook to death. I daren't go on youtube or else I'll definitely still be on my computer for another hour plus. Did you know there is a facebook group called 'cat on lap syndrome' to raise awareness about my current condition? Well you do now. I should probably join it. I just did. That facebook group has 44 members. At least I know I'm not alone.

Oh no! She just fell asleep! Things have gone from bad to worse! I may well be here for quite a while! Youtube here I come...

M x

Meet Bob:

Bob

I purchased Bob on a whim last weekend when I was in Wilkos for more cat litter, and I walked past the toys and treats. I named him Bob as a whim too. After I bought Bob, I scolded myself because 'Tifa isn't bothered by cat toys other than the fishing rod interactive type ones, and she'd ignore Bob. Or so I thought.

I presented 'Tifa with Bob (who has a chord that if you pull, he'll speed off along the floor). She eyed him up momentarily and then pounced on him! I looked on incredulously: since when did she like toys like this? Still, it at least meant that Bob wasn't a waste of 99p.

Over the last week, 'Tifa has decided that she really likes Bob. She thoroughly enjoys giving Bob a damned good kicking. Bob has been whacked and clawed and kicked and tossed across the whole flat. I keep finding Bob in different rooms: every time I stop paying attention or go out, he's been beaten up and chased into another room! It's very cute when 'Tifa gets Bob stuck in her claws and shakes him off like a comedy cartoon crab on someone's finger. When she does this and Bob finally comes unstuck, she wangs him incredibly far distances and this amuses me.

I wonder why 'Tifa likes Bob so much? Bob is larger than any other cat toy of a similar type that she's ever had, so that might be it? Maybe he has catnip inside him? Perhaps the shape of him, which lends itself to bouncing about when he is wanged, is what makes him appealing? Or is it simply because he has a cute, squished up face?

Whatever the reason for my kitty liking Bob, I'm pleased that 'Tifa has a new 'friend'. But poor old Bob!

M x

People say things to me like "it's cruel to keep a cat indoors."

What a load of utter balony! These people are clearly ignorant, borderline stupid, and don't know what they're talking about. It might be considered cruel to keep a cat indoors that obviously wants to go outside, but even then there might be a good reason (such as living on a main road). But some cats just don't need or want to go outside, and 'Tifa is one of those kitties.

Whenever I get home, the noise of me turning the key in the lock attracts 'Tifa, and she is almost always there to meet me when I get in. I say hello and she meows then trots off to the bedroom expecting me to follow and indulge her with cuddles (which, of course, I do). Not once has she ever attempted to dart out of the door when I enter or leave the flat, which makes me pretty confident of her contentedness in our home. The flat is her territory in exactly the same way as a cat would have a territory outside. She's a happy kitty, and I'm a happy queen because she's a happy kitty.

It really irritates me when judgemental people who don't know what they're talking about say that I'm being cruel to my girl for keeping her inside: wrong, wrong, WRONG!

M x